Am i to uproot my family and live amongst the urban poor? Am i to set my course for having a huge family? Am i to quit my job and live by faith? Or get a second job and focus all of my efforts on providing for my family? Or should I be looking for other families who want to move in together in some abandoned farmhouse? I wish I knew how God wanted me to express His love, His life, in a radical way.
What is it in me that wants to be something other than the status quo? It's the normalcy that's so maddening! The desire to be other-than the typical Western Luke warm Christian is almost like a drug I crave, yet i can't seem to get a fix. And sometime's it's hard to think of being radical for Jesus when the everyday responsibilities of life seem overwhelming.
i guess this is the place where the reader expects me to answer my own question...unfortunately, I don't have the answers to my own question...That's part of the reason i'm blogging. i'm hoping to encounter others who are on a similar journey of re-monking their lives. i want your help. i covet your prayers. i want to start a dialogue. i have a lot of questions...and not a lot of answers. but here is what i do know:
1. i'm not satisfied with the status quo
2. i want to live a radical lifestyle for Jesus
3. i often struggle with the fear of getting passed by for someone more "willing or able"
4. i tend to be paralyzed by uncertainty of God's will or missing His timing
5. i struggle with balance: the ordinary and the radical
6. i'm far from radical, but it's where i'm going...my sights are set.
In the Lion, In the Lamb,
Mark
Mark, I love your heart in this post. This is where Ben and I are much of the time. My life doesn't always look radical, but I assure you that my willingness to follow Jesus wherever he leads is. Thank you for sharing your heart. I'm enjoying reading your blog. :) Love, my friend.
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